Dec 22, 2014

Update on parenting and how I haven't lost my shit yet

As most of you know, we are new parents.  Parenting doesn't come with a guide book... but let me tell you it does come with everyone and their mother telling you how to raise your kids.  The fact that I have years and years of this coming my way makes me cringe.  It's amazing how being a new parent you are completely clueless but somehow manage by the end of the day to make out alive.  Yes there are tons of books out there to read about parenting and all that stuff, but I am here to share a little secret with you.  It just comes to you.  You don't need to read those books.  Somehow someway you figure out what you need to do.  Call it instinct.

So here we are, our baby girl is about to turn 4 months old and I am proud to say that we are all sane.  WIN.  She's 10 lbs now and 22 inches long.  I have a feeling she will be tall like her daddy and not fun size like me.  She sleeps through the night, 8 hours.  Yes you read that right.  She eats 5-6 ozs every 5 hours.  And 99.9% of the time, she is a freaking happy baby.  We are blessed.

A photo posted by Kenya (@kenyagiggles) on

On Saturday, my grandmother was here from CT and Sophia got to take a picture with her great grandmother.  I love writing that sentence.  I vaguely remember my great grandmother when I was small and I know how special it is to say that.  I was so happy when my grandmother had the chance to meet Sophia and hold her.  And Sophia LOVED her and was laughing and talking away.

Melts my heart.

This weekend we also went shopping for Christmas presents.  I will NEVER EVER wait this long EVER again... especially when I needed to go Toys R Us... place was a freaking mad house and just manuevering the aisle with the stroller made me want to punch someone in the face.... AND THEN SOPHIA DECIDED TO HAVE A POOPY DIAPER.  Yeah... not fun.  But we made it out alive.  Hubs then went off the BJ's (insert fallic joke here) and came home with my favorite red wine because clearly he understands that I was so close to losing my shit. But what makes me love that man even more is his genius idea of how to bring the wine home safely.. via the car seat base:

A photo posted by Kenya (@kenyagiggles) on

GENIUS. Love that man.

And here we are short week for work... woop woop.. except that I lose hours since i'm contract.. BOO... especially during the holidays BUT I am grateful to have a job so there's that.

I am suppose to be cooking part of Christmas dinner this week since my parents are on vacation.  Wish me luck, I am going to need it. And I just realized I need to go food shopping... FML.

Peace out peeps.

Dec 19, 2014

We all have our good moments and bad moments

Do you ever catch yourself in a slump and don't even realize how you got there?
I feel like I'm in one.  That moment when there are just so many things happening around you and when you stop for a quick second and think "Is this OK for me?"

I have been asking myself that question a lot recently.  Life happens.  Sometimes it's good and sometimes it's bad.  I feel like I am constantly reminding myself to just go with the flow and it will work out in the end.  But then I have been thinking "what am I doing for me?"

I'm a Leo so it's natural for me to be very loyal.  Sometimes I feel like it's a weakness for me.  Being so loyal I tend to forget that I also need to do what's best for me and really see the bigger picture.  It gives me great pride to be helpful to others and make them happy.  When I am here to help you in whatever you may need, I try my dam best to do a good job.  You need to laugh, I got you covered.  You need to cry, I am here to lean on. You need to vent, I am here to listen.  You need this done, I can get it done for you.

So I sit here and realize that I do a lot for other people and sometimes I get the recognition I think I deserve and sometimes I don't.  So at what point do I say enough is enough and that I need to make a decision for myself.  It takes me a while but I think I am realizing that even though it would hurt some people for me to "move on," I still need to do me.

So let's see if I can figure this whole "just think about myself for once to better my life" scenario.

This should be a doozy.

Dec 16, 2014

Keeping up with the Joneses - NOT

Let me tell you, Pinterest and blog land make it real hard to keep up with stuff.

All I ever see is perfect parties, perfect photographed kids, perfect holiday cards, perfect houses, etc.

You all are making the rest of us normal human beings look bad. Just saying.

Here's my list of how I am not keeping up with the Joneses...

  • I just did Sophia's birth announcement cards... which I tied together to also be the Christmas card, which just got delivered yesterday, a week before. 
  • I have not had professional photos of Sophia done because I was so inspired by all of you and then when I saw the price tag I was like, yeah.. that's not happening.  Just not possible. 
  • I have yet to send out thank you cards from baby shower. ugh.
  • Sophia's room doesn't look like it should belong in a Martha Steward magazine. Whatevsss
  • I haven't bounced back from pregnancy weight and I am OK with it. Takes the dam pressure off.  I will eventually get there. 
  • I don't have onesies for every freaking holiday to put on my child. 
  • I just put up our Christmas decorations in our apartment and half of them are homemade and not fancy. 
  • I haven't event thought about what I am going to get Sophia for her first Christmas present. 
  • We have yet to take pictures with Santa with Sophia because I refuse to deal with mall crowds for an overpriced picture of bad quality.  We may be going this Saturday to local firehouse so let's see how that works.
  • The laundry is piling up, the house is dirty and the dog needs a grooming session like two weeks ago. 
I am kind of glad I am not keeping up because it sounds like way too much work and I am one tired new mama who is just trying to make it every day. 

Dec 8, 2014

Cookies, Dexter and Baby girl

Happy Monday y'all!

This weekend was my first weekend after going back to work and I was just so excited to cuddle with Sophia the whole weekend since I missed her so much. Thanks to rainy Saturday and a cold Sunday, that's exactly what I did.  

Weekend happenings included...

  • Sophia and I camping out in the bedroom while we watched the final season of Dexter.  I know, SO appropriate for a 3 month old but she slept through a good portion so I'm sure her brain isn't as traumatized. I was suppose to clean and do all that fun stuff, but people kept telling me to forget about cooking and cleaning when you're taking care of the baby all day so I did just that.  YOU HEAR THAT HUBS. But I really need to get cleaning this week because it is kind of ridic but who has time for that when I come home from work, take care of Sophia, cook dinner, wash dishes, make all of Sophia's bottles for the next day, attempt to have my work clothes ready for next day, lay out Sophia's clothes and also pack us lunch when there is leftovers.  Not me.. I have no time for that.  Ugh, someone send a cook and maid. 
  • Sunday I decided to make cookies.  I can bake the shit out of cakes, but when it comes to making cookies, I usually fail miserably.  This time though.... WIN.  I got the recipe from a high school friend for the Italian Knot Cookies.  I got all the shit together and attempted to make them.  This was such a big win that I just can't believe it.  They came out PERFECT.  

A photo posted by Kenya (@kenyagiggles) on

A photo posted by Kenya (@kenyagiggles) on

  • Sophia and I continued our Dexter marathon watching on Sunday night as well.  
  • OH, Sophia slept for NINE HOURS... yes you read that correctly, 9 HOURS on Saturday night!  I can't remember the last time I slept for 9 hours.  All last week she started sleeping between 7-8 hours too which is FANTASTIC for my preemie 3 month old.  Let's hope this trend continues. It's like she knew mama needs her to sleep like that while I am back at work. 

Hope your weekend was good?  Did you do anything interesting? 

Dec 5, 2014

I'm that new mom at work

I went back to work this week and so far it has been going good.  Everything seems to have come back easily work wise and I am slowly getting back into the groove of things.

But I have been getting this question from a lot of people who have welcomed me back:
"How are you doing being back at work away from the baby?"

I think the typical answer especially for new moms would be that it's an adjustment and hard to leave the baby. But my answer has been quite the opposite.  I'm all like "It's great! Not worried at all and it wasn't hard for me to leave her."

I am sure that some people may think it was a bit "heartless" but as I sat here yesterday after talking about it with someone, I kept thinking to myself why am I so OK with it and why I didn't feel any anxiety about it all. Then it hit me.  I'm a preemie mom.  When Sophia and I were at our most vulnerable, we had to be separated.  For 27 days I had to leave her in a hospital.  27 days.  I had to leave her at the most crucial time, the very beginning of bonding.  During that time, every time I left her I wasn't sure what the next day was going to bring.  If we were going to be presented with any new challenges.  Hands down the hardest thing to do was to leave my baby girl everyday.  So I think now that I am back at work, leaving her doesn't affect me as it does to other moms because it was a norm for me before.  This time, I leave her with my mother in law and I know that when I come home, I get to hug her and play with her vs seeing her in an incubator with wires and tubes.  I was forced to be OK with the separation anxiety.  So now, it's not separation anxiety for me.  It's just me going to work and Sophia spending quality time with her grandmother.  For that I am grateful.

For my mamas, how was the adjustment period for you when you started working again?